Can I just hibernate?
I wish I could hibernate. That way I could just cell up and go to sleep….when I wake up, time will have passed and I won’t feel all this suffering that everyone says will pass in time.
I.finally got a few hours of sleep, and woke with a blinding headache and neck pain. It’s raining this morning….we used to love to lay in bed and listen to the rain. Now he is laying in bed with her…still enjoying it, and with no connection emotionally to the 23 years we did that together. Seriously…how does a person just completely detach and devote it all to an unattractive drunk slut? It’s as if I never existed. And one week ago yesterday he was holding my hand, hugging me, laughing and saying he loved me..this was in front of our daughter..one week later he was on the phone with her, lecturing her about how she should support his relationship (with his former best friends wife…his mistress who destroyed our lives) ending it with ” one day you will understand”. Ummmmm….no…..she understands now. Wrong never becomes right. No matter how you try to rewrite history, sugar coat your misdeeds, or lie about how things occurred, the truth is always the truth.
So I lay here…broke, alone, in pain physically and mentally…I just want to hibernate